Mama
by MouHitoriNoKei
Summary: A songfic to the Spice Girl song Mama. Yusuke is now 25 when his mother, Atsuko, is stolen. Yusuke reflects back on his past.


While listening to this song, I could only think of what would happen to one of my favorite anime bishis...if he lost his mom, so, this is where this idea came up. I hope you like this songfic...^_^

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or the Spice Girl's song "Mama"

(A/N: I refer to Yusuke not being what he thought he was....now...not to spoil it for anyway, but....Ahhh...forget it. If you wanna know what I mean, please, feel free to e-mail me @ TeamExtremeBabe@aol.com. I'll gladly explain.)

"Why not, Daddy?! It's not fair! Everyone else is going!" The child screeched, stomping around in one spot. His father only flipped through the newspaper with a childish grin.

"If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?" Hiding a laugh, he glanced at his son, remembering how much he hated when his mom said that to him. Visions of himself as a child flashed in front of his eyes. He was reckless, and he would never forgot it. As his thin raven bangs blew in the afternoon breeze, the love of his life entered the room with tear stained eyes.

"Yusuke, she's gone....." She spoke in such quiet words, as the playing child looked up to his mother with a childlike frown. 

"What's wrong, Mommy?" He tugged on his mother's apron, confused on why the tears clung to her cheeks. Such an innocent child, not knowing the difference between life and death, dead and alive. His mother kneeled on one knee and embraced her little boy.

Yusuke looked up from his paper, swallowing the thick air in his mouth. "She's...." He paused, holding back the tears that dwelled within. _No, men don't cry...._He told himself. "....Gone...." Standing as the noble warrior he once was, he looked to his wife, his love, and to his child.

"Kaeko, call the gang. They all must attend." She nodded, hurrying into the kitchen, removing the small book of phone numbers from her pocket. She scanned quickly, first seeing Kazuma Kuwabara/Yukina. They were living together, against Hiei's better judgment. Scanning down further, she saw Kurama/Hiei, who had been living together for quite a while, Kurama forbidding Hiei to live alone anymore. Botan lived with Yusuke and Kaeko, so she already knew. Dialing each number carefully, she informed everyone of the tragedy that fell upon them.

"Daddy...?" The young boy looked up as his father lifted him up into his arms.

With a deep sigh, Yusuke muttered the words he hoped he never would have to say in front of the child, only five years of age. "Rei, your grandmother has passed...."

Tears steadily forming, Rei wrapped his arms tightly around his father's neck, sobbing into his shoulder. "Grandma Atsuko....." The child wept, as did his father.

"Mother...."

'Mama'

By The Spice Girls

Yusuke's POV

****

[She used to be my only enemy and never let me free,   
Catching me in places that I know I shouldn't be,   
Ever other day I crossed the line, I didn't mean to be so bad,   
I never thought you would become the friend I never had]

I never wanted to walk this path, down the quiet carpeted route to a still memory, a portrait of my dear mother. From the moment I was born, I knew I wasn't going to get along with her, as did she. I guess I just had this mischievous look in my eyes. I never listened to her, I was always the one to get in trouble, and I was always the first to see eyes fill with tears, knowing she couldn't handle the terror for a son she had. And, sorrow swept over me, to know that I made her cry. So, I straightened up, still being a bit of a hardass, street punk. That was my nature. Inside, I really wanted to make my mom happy. I mean, she raised me and what does she get in return? A rebellious asshole of a child? No...Why do you think I entered the Dark Tournament? To prove myself to everyone. My friends, Kaeko, and her...Mostly her, though. Though I would never show it, she was my best friend. Kuwabara, Kurama, Hiei, Botan, Kaeko, yes, I love them all with all my heart, but none of them can take the place of my mom. I mean, was I that blind, as to have not noticed my best friend was standing in front of me my entire life, or was I just stupid. I guess I'll never know.

The day came quickly, and as I straightened my tie, Rei approached me, wearing a suit I had worn when I was his age. He looked like me, with Kaeko's eyes, such beautiful, deep eyes. "Daddy?" He began.

"Yes, Rei?" My usual response as I slicked my ebony hair back, a few strands still popping out from my aggravated head. 

In that childlike voice, he locked his dark chestnut eyes upon me. "Why'd Grandma Atsuko have to leave us?" This question paralyzed my lips. I couldn't answer that innocent child in what seemed like forever. His pure eyes never left me, as I managed to spit out a few words.

"It wasn't her choice, Rei." Finally getting my tie on straight, I kneeled down to my bewildered son, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Rei, death is a process. Whenever one is taken away, another one is born in his or her place. That's just the way it is...With death comes life, and with life comes death." He seemed to grasp it, or so it seemed...

****

[Back then I didn't know why, why you were misunderstood,   
So now I see through your eyes, all that you did was love,   
Mama I love you, Mama I care,   
Mama I love you, Mama my friend,   
My friend]  


Why you, Mom? Your time on this Earth was short, and you gave us no warning to your passing. I mean, yes, we knew about the illness that plagued you, but we never knew your time on this Earth was so short. Death is a cruel thing, Mother, and I only realize this now. When you told me not to do the things I did, you were only trying to warn me about the cruel possibility of death. All my life, I've been cheating death, avoiding it at the cost of others'. Now that I'm older, I realize all the stupid mistakes I made those 10 years ago at the Dark Tournament. I was reckless, only taking those words you gave me as motherly babblings, like most of the other mothers would do if their son was about to face death over and over again. I contorted all the words you told me to make them out like you were out to get me, always trying to ruin my life. I was wrong, Mom, I was wrong. You were only trying to provide the guidance I so badly needed. Without a father all my life, I grew to be a very rigid and disobedient kid, and you only did the things you did to protect me from the somewhat evil world. 

Why is it that I had to realize what you meant to me after death? Maybe I am as thickheaded as Genkai told me 10 years ago...Those 10 years speeded by, leaving me at a standstill. I learned that I did have a father...I also learned that I'm not what I thought I was...those words will never cross my lips again. My friends and I grew closer then ever, and I realized the love I had for Kaeko. We got married, and that you were, Mom, sitting in the front, crying your eyes out. You were watching your baby boy getting married to the woman he loved, and you could only be happy for me. I remember what you said after the wedding, in the sarcastic voice I admired.

"I'm expecting grandchildren, Yusuke..."

And, I could only smile. You knew me and Kaeko would get together...you knew. I know why...You only wanted me to be happy, and I am now, with my son and my wife. I love you, Mom...Why did you have to leave....?

****

[I didn't want to hear it then but I'm not ashamed to say it now,   
Every little thing you said and did was right for me,   
I had a lot of time to think about, about the way I used to be,   
Never had a sense of my responsibility]

"Yusuke..." Looking up, Kurama stood with a hand on my trembling shoulder. "I'm so sorry for your lose. Atsuko was a billant woman..." His voice was so tender. I knew those words were words I could trust.

"Thanks, Kurama." He embraced me like a friend would. Beside him stood Hiei. Surprisingly, he was dressed in a suit and tie. With a sheepish grin, I walked to Hiei and looked down upon him. Kurama gently nudged the youkai as the words finally came to him.

"I'm sorry about your mother." He said coldly, yet, I could sense the compassion within. Abruptly, I hugged the little fire youkai tightly as he only looked to me in surprise, slowly easing into the hug. He gently squeezed back and looked to me with trivial hatred. 

"Means a lot to me, Hiei." 

"It better. This is the last time you'll see me dressed in this ridiculous getup...." There's the Hiei I knew...I could only smile as Kurama nudged me gently with his shoulder.

"It took me an hour to convince him to come, and another two hours to get his stubborn self into the suit. Be grateful he's here in one piece." He giggled a bit, his crimson hair as bouncy as ever. He looked good for being 25, still had those hypnotic jade eyes and shiny crimson hair, tied back in a tight ponytail. Hiei was the same as well, but I could swear he got shorter. Little pipsqueak.

Knocking over a few people, Kuwabara made his way over with Yukina being dragged. Seeing the ice apparition, Hiei looked away quickly, averting eye contact with the sister that wasn't really his sister.

"Tell her...." Kurama whispered into his ear before getting smacked in the head by Hiei.

"Shut up." He snarled, looking to me as I smirked. "Can it, Urameshi." 

The big oaf finally got his awkward self to me as he wrapped his oversized arms around me, sobbing hysterical. I could see Kurama giggle slightly, Hiei smiling as well. "Urameshi, are you okay?!" He squeezed me tight to his chest as I tried my best to breath.

"I'm...fine...Kuwabara....now....please....let me...go..." He released me and I brushed myself off. 

"Heh, sorry, Urameshi." I shook my head with a smile on my face, as I set my eyes on Yukina. Geez, she did look an awful lot like Hiei. Same eyes, same face. "Doesn't Yukina look great?" If you call looking morbid looking great. She wore a simple black dress, her hair let down just past her shoulders. She did look beautiful, but the look in her eyes threatened that beauty.

"Hey, Yukina." I smiled, looking down to her. Yup, she had Hiei's height, too...She looked up at me with those scarlet eyes. "What's wrong?"

She seemed to speak in a voice consumed by sadness. "I still haven't found my brother."

Eyeing Hiei, I put my hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry. You'll find him. I bet he's thinking about you this very moment." Both Kurama and I shot a glance in Hiei's direction as the guilt swept over his body.

"Um...Yukina? Can I talk to you for a minute?" Hiei spoke up, taking her hand and dragging her away from the furious Kuwabara.

"What's he tryin' to do?! Steal my girl?!"

Kurama and I laughed a bit, Kurama whispering something into Kuwabara's ear, making his jaw drop. 

"NO WAY!" 

I know how Hiei feels now. Him telling Yukina that he's her brother must be hard. It's the same as me admitting that I was a bad son, never showing responsibly or kindness towards you. Even in the afterlife, I hope you can forgive me....

  
**[Back then I didn't know why, why you were misunderstood,   
So now I see through your eyes, all that you did was love,   
Mama I love you, Mama I care,   
Mama I love you, Mama my friend,   
My friend]**

Suddenly, a pull on my pant leg brought me out of the memories that encased me so. "Daddy..." A weak and innocent voice rang gently through my ears.

"Rei..." His eyes seemed a bit red, as I lifted him up, holding him lovingly in my arms. "What's wrong?"

Rubbing the tears out of his eyes, he looked up at me, and I was reminded of how you held me...lovingly, yet you left some space for me to spread my wings and fly. "What were you like when you were my age?" Rei asked, curiosity in his juvenile voice.

"Well, I was very rebellious." 

"What's that mean?"  
"Rebellious? I never did what I was told. I always ignored my mother. I was a very bad kid." Finally, the truth was spoken. I sighed as Rei looked at me with confusion.

"You don't seem that way now, Daddy."

"Yeah, because I realized that that's not the way to live. I made Grandma very upset by living like that. I was reckless, always rushing into things, and when Grandma would tell me not to do things, I got mad at her, saying it wasn't fair. But, I just realized that everything she did, she did for a reason." Seeing Rei listen attentively made it all worth while, telling my five year old how bad I was. "Never be like that, Rei. Whatever me or you mother do is for the best. We love you very much..." Before I finished my sentence, Rei was clinging to my shirt, resting his head against my chest. 

"Daddy, I miss Grandma."

"Yeah, so do I...."

  
**[But now I'm sure I know why, why you were misunderstood,   
So now I see through your eyes, all I can give you is love,   
Mama I love you, Mama I care,   
Mama I love you, Mama my friend,   
My friend   
Mama I love you, Mama I care,   
Mama I love you, Mama my friend,   
My friend]**

My eyes were clouded those ten years ago, Mom. After everyone had left, I could only reminisce, looking at pictures of myself as a child being held in your arms. You would smile, and I would pout, but I loved it when you cradled me. It made me feel safe, though I never said it. Mom, you were more then my mom, my guardian, my guiding light, you were my friend. You were my best friend, better a friend then Kaeko, Kurama, Hiei, or Kuwabara. I love you, Mom, and I always will.

"Yusuke..." Kaeko called from the kitchen, hanging up the phone in disbelief. 

"What's wrong, Kaeko?" He collapsed into my arms with a smile on her face. Her eyes lit up with excitement as she peered up at me.

"Yusuke....Remember those mornings I woke up and felt very nauseous?" I nodded my head as she beamed even more. "Well, I just got off the phone with the doctor and...."

"And...And what?!" I shouted, the anticipation killing me. 

"I'm pregnant!" She shrieked as I took her in my arms and swung her around as she giggled. "Yusuke! Be careful...I'm carrying a baby!"

I could only laugh, kissing her tender lips. "Kaeko, this is great...What about a name? We need a name!"

My love giggled, placing a hand on my shoulder. "The baby hasn't come yet, Yusuke. No need to rush."

I protested. "No! We need a name now..." Thinking back, all I could see was you. "I have the perfect name...." I paused, closing my eyes and sighing deeply, letting the heavenly name slip from my lips. "Atsuko....." I love you, Mom, and blessed with that name, my child will know of a great woman called Grandma. Mother, my protecter, my friend....my Mom....


End file.
